Finding and valuing your own voice does not equate to silencing others or not valuing their input, but rather to trusting your own mind instead of letting others decide for you. Training your mind in this manner will enable you to better develop social skills, establish healthy relationships with others, ...
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If you’ve finally made the decision to seek out counselling, you may be wondering how to prepare for your first therapy session. It can feel stressful and even a bit awkward during the initial appointment when you don’t know what to expect. But just remember, this process feels challenging for ...
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Perhaps you have been struggling to make sense of your career path as of late, feeling adrift and as if your work isn’t making a meaningful impact. Or, what if you spent much of 2019 doubting yourself? With not only a new year but a new decade now in full ...
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Do you usually feel stressed out over the holidays? If so, you’re certainly not alone. From holiday shopping to hosting Christmas dinner to attending corporate parties and enduring oodles of family time – it can feel like a giant whirlwind to handle. But you can equip yourself with some effective ...
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When attempting to cope with the loss of a friend or loved one, it can feel overwhelmingly difficult to ever be happy again. This is especially true if the loss is greater, such as that of a spouse or child. Nevertheless, we persevere, and many of us turn to the ...
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Everybody deserves a companion and friendship. In some cases – many, in fact – there is a tremendous struggle to find another human being to connect and bond with. Not all of us are raised in happy households. At the same time, many of us find it difficult to cope ...
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Do you know someone who has been bitten by the travel bug and just can’t wait to go on a new adventure? Perhaps you’ve also noticed that they have become more outgoing, positive, optimistic and have a fresh new perspective since seeing more of the world. It’s not an illusion; ...
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We all know some people who have a hard time making sense of the world around them. Many times, these individuals are struggling internally to find themselves, and understanding others seems to be even more difficult to achieve. Add to that the fact that modern society is chaotic, noisy, commercialized ...
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Many people who struggle with a negativity bias, emotional instability, phobias and other forms of long-term psychological trauma can often trace the roots back to how they were raised. It can be an extremely difficult subject for many to discuss, primarily because their perspective differs so much from that of ...
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Have you been feeling the winter blues or under the weather lately? As it happens, what it’s like outside can play a significant role in influencing your mood and mental state. Perhaps you have noticed yourself or others getting grumpy and feeling gloomy over this past winter, and maybe you ...
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It is common knowledge that travel is healthy for the soul, but what about the mind? The very act of changing surrounding environments can deliver tremendous mental wellness gains in a variety of ways. From boosting consciousness to enhancing moods and more, travel enables you to interact with the surrounding ...
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February is a month often spent celebrating relationships. Whether with a spouse, common-law partner or otherwise, Valentine’s Day festivities continue to enamour us all – well, at least a good percentage of us. The truth is, we often cannot see through the colourful façade produced by what is now an ...
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What do you aspire to achieve in life? Financial success? A healthy, happy family? The opportunity to travel and see what the rest of the world is like? Or, perhaps all of the above appeal to you and merely getting there has been a challenge. Dreaming is healthy for the ...
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There’s no doubt that we take ourselves for granted on a regular basis. This is particularly true during the holiday season when so much focus is on giving weight to consumerism and putting others first, which can be mentally and financially taxing. The line, “Maybe Christmas doesn’t come from a ...
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Lately, we have been examining different ways to be better to ourselves. However, it is also essential to focus on how we present ourselves to others in order to prevent a vicious cycle of assumptions and misconceptions. Ironically, this involves blocking out the noise of the world and focusing within. ...
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No matter how hard you try to maintain optimism and a confident demeanour, it does not mean your brain is going to cooperate. This happens to everyone, and the cause is hardwired into us from birth — it is known as brain negativity bias. Simply put, this means that our ...
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In modern society, where much of what is posted online serves as an illusion, it is all too easy to become afraid of missing out. From a general perspective, this fear is triggered by the anxiety associated with the development of a self-produced stigma, which itself is an illusion that ...
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Internet Gaming Disorder is a recent classification that has continued to stir up controversy and heated debates over the past several years. However, rather than acting on an assumption, we can benefit from learning the specifics of this much-debated disorder. There are many aspects to consider before presenting a diagnosis, ...
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To be doing good deeds is man’s most glorious task. – Sophocles If you’re feeling an altruistic desire to do some good, know that it’s much easier to accomplish than you may think. Doing good – whether it’s towards yourself, others, your community, or to the rest of the world ...
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Taking things personally is something we’re all guilty of doing at some point or another – often on a daily basis. As social beings, our interactions and relationships with others can impact our own well-being and how we feel about our lives. And although we all have our sensitive spots, ...
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Guilt and shame are very powerful emotions – arguably, two of the most powerful emotions that we humans experience. Whether it’s from abuse that occurred during childhood, feelings of rejection or failure, or feeling inadequacy with our own self-worth – we’ve all experienced a degree of these emotions at some ...
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All of us experience the sensation of fear and anxiety at various points throughout our lives. Fear is caused by a real and understood threat, like fear of being unable to cope or protect oneself, or fear of a real threat if attacked or assaulted. Fear is specific, immediate, and ...
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Sadness can be a beautiful yet frustrating thing, depending on its form and utilization by an individual. It is associated with elevated physiological arousal, and activates the body to respond to loss, despair, disadvantage, sorrow, grief, or helplessness — physical or emotional influencers that impact a person’s experience in life. ...
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Anger, like other emotions, acts as a form of behavioural regulation, built into the neural architecture of humans over evolutionary time. Essentially, anger is an emotional response that produces a surge of energy and motivation within the minds of humans when specific situations or events demand such behaviour to be ...
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We all know how important it is to take care of our bodies to achieve optimal health. In this quest for physical wellbeing, our emotional health often gets lost in the details. Although emotional health is an equally important aspect of your whole body health our relation to emotions is ...
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In a world where social media and pop culture seem inescapable, it can be difficult to avoid passing judgment. Everyone is guilty of judging the behaviour or appearance of others at one point or another, whether aloud or privately to ourselves. In such a critical culture, most people often criticize ...
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Narcissism is characterized by extreme self-centeredness and self-absorption. Narcissists are captivated by their own attributes and crave attention and admiration from others at all times. Their worldview is unpredictable and perplexing. These people are unhappy with themselves and they tend to blame others for their swinging moods and erratic behavior. ...
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It’s easy to say that you are afraid of spiders, or that you don’t like heights, but unless you suffer from an actual phobia you may be lucky to escape the experience of the crushing fear associated with severe phobias. A phobia is defined as “an extreme or irrational fear ...
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We all go through moments in life where we try to make someone else happy. Whether it be towards a spouse, an in-law, or a colleague, everyone has done more than their fair share of “people pleasing” in their life. Sometimes this can be an acceptable practice, like conceding to ...
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We’re constantly told how bad chronic stress is for the welfare of our health. It is a serious matter that needs to be reduced and controlled for the sake of your physical, psychological, and emotional health. How can you control chronic stress when it is influenced by factors outside of ...
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Although many of us have a tendency to group the term anxiety and panic attacks in the same boat, from a clinical perspective they are actually different. This is mainly evident in the variations among triggers, symptoms, occurrence, and treatment. Here’s a deeper look at what those differences entail. Triggers: ...
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Physically, our basic needs are nourishment, hydration and sleep. But our basic needs also include mental and psychological well-being. Ignoring these psychological needs may lead to anxiety or depression, which can have negative repercussions for every aspect of your life. Think of the old adage of the millionaire that has ...
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Effectively balancing your wants and needs is a difficult feat for anyone. It’s completely natural to feel a stronger motivation to go after your immediate wants than take care of your higher needs; to go after things that are easier to attain in the present and provide immediate pleasure and ...
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Divorce is tough. There’s no way around it. Even if the decision was mutual, the most amicable separations and divorces cause some level of emotional trauma for both parties. The level of trauma varies from person to person dependent on a variety of factors, but no matter the situation, going ...
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Distress and anxiety caused by stress can lead to many restless nights. Even worse, once you are sleep deprived your anxiety levels tend to rise creating a vicious cycle that can feel overwhelming. The most important thing to do in this situation is to relax. Try to distract yourself from ...
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Identifying and isolating what triggers your stress and causes your affliction is a very important step towards better managing your stress levels. Often, we experience undue stress by factors out of our control such as school, work, our health or children. Other times, we experience stress by perpetuating negative thoughts, ...
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For those days in life when your fourth cup of coffee has you completely wired, or when those deadlines and “to do” lists pile higher than you can bare, or when life take the reigns and snaps away your time to decompress – it could be time to introduce some ...
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Your health and stress go hand in hand. They are connected on a physiological level that many of us may not realize. Unhealthy stress that is persistent and constant can have a profound effect throughout your body. Stress is a normal part of life, but when it becomes a pervasive ...
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For many of us, identifying the stressors in life that cause headaches, tense muscles, anxiety, and overall stress are no mystery. Common stress triggers include finances, job stress, relationship troubles, and family pressure. Having too much on one’s plate, too little down time, and practicing unhealthy habits are also common ...
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We’ve all endured stress at work. Between the piles of deadlines growing on your desk, to those long, arduous meetings that cut into your ability to actually complete those deadlines, to the overpaid boss that just won’t leave you be – it’s no surprise how much stress can wear you ...
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Stress has negative connotations, and rightly so. When you are overstressed, it feels like there is an extra weight on your mind and body. Even daily life activities like eating and sleeping are affected by stress. At the same time, stress in small doses has some benefits. After all, stress ...
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This is the third article in our ongoing stress series. Previous articles include The Biology of Stress and Recognizing the Early Warning Signs of Stress. When work starts to get overwhelming, when household responsibilities begin to pile up, when your relationships cause you to feel tired, worn out, and hopeless, ...
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According to a 2010 study by Statistics Canada, “1 in 4 Canadian workers described their day-to-day lives as highly stressful.” Prolonged and consistent stress is associated with negative health patterns like smoking, over-consuming alcohol, improper sleep hygiene, and poor eating habits. Stress also contributes to negative health consequences including high ...
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Stress is a natural, healthy part of life. Evolutionarily, it’s a process that allows our bodies to cope with danger by engaging a cascade of biological events. Though stress was a mechanism designed to protect us from mortal danger, in modern terms our consistent levels of stress are caused by ...
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In The Joy Diet: 10 Daily Practices for a Happier Life, Martha Beck writes that “doing nothing is the most productive activity you will ever undertake.” When we speak of stillness, this is exactly what we mean. Doing nothing. Not meditation, or prayer, or brainstorming, or problem-solving, only stillness. The ...
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Boundaries are limits that separate actions, words, emotions, and sensations that we consider safe, appropriate, appreciated, and welcome, from things we do not consider acceptable. Boundaries can be physical, emotional, sexual, or spiritual. Everyone has different boundaries and only you can define your personal limits. Boundaries are often established through ...
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Although giving and receiving is undoubtedly a hugely important part of life, it becomes even more significant at Christmas time. Christmas is a time of togetherness, and the giving and receiving of love and gifts with our family and friends. Gift of Attention – Spend Time With Your Loved Ones ...
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Believe it or not, facing serious illness or mortality does not have to be unbearable. Of course, being diagnosed with a life-changing or terminal illness can be emotionally and physically debilitating, affecting each and every person you love. But, for those who like to think as the glass being “half ...
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Sympathetic joy essentially means to experience a sense of joy in the basic goodness of others and in the fundamental well being of ourselves. In other words, it is “being happy for someone” the way we would feel proud of ourselves when we achieve things like getting a good grade ...
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The funny thing about the concept of “listening” is that people assume it’s so easy because it comes naturally. Believe it or not, it doesn’t. Some people seem like “natural born” listeners, while for others it takes an effort and a mindful approach to become an engaged listener. Listening to ...
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This article is the final installment in a four-part series about attachment styles. Each of these four styles is a component of a psychological model called attachment theory. The theory attempts to articulate how people connect with and relate to one another. Everyone’s individual attachment style begins to take shape ...
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This is the third in a four-part series on attachment patterns. The four attachments are part of a psychological model known as attachment theory. This model describes how people relate to one another. We form attachment styles as infants, primarily through the child-parent relationship. Our childhood experiences go on to ...
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This article is the second in a four-part series about attachment styles. These four styles are a component of attachment theory, a psychological model that attempts to articulate how people connect with and relate to one another. Our individual attachment style is determined shortly after birth, based on the child-parent ...
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This is the first in a four-part series on attachment patterns. The four attachment styles are part of attachment theory, a psychological model that describes the how people relate to one another. We form our attachment styles as babies based on the child-parent relationship. These styles go on to influence ...
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Do you live your life based on your own values, or based on a perception of how things “should” be done? When you have a decision to make, no matter how big or small, do you evaluate the impact it will have on your life and how it fits within ...
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The Buddha’s central teaching has succinctly been summarized by American mediation teacher Shinzen Young in the mathematical formula “pain times resistance = suffering.” When we resist pain, it leads to suffering proportionate to our resistance. When we don’t respond with resistance there is no suffering. How is this possible? According ...
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It doesn’t have to be January 1st to make big changes in your life. If you resolve to start leading a more whole and fulfilling life, your Ottawa therapist can help. Here are some different activities you can do to find more pleasure in life: Senses Humans have five well ...
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In today’s world, there is a fixation on what we “do.” When approached at a social gathering, the first you’re ever asked is “what do you do for a living?” Your child walks in the door, and you ask her “what did you do today?” Yet as human beings, life ...
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Whenever you are faced with a challenge or presented with an opportunity, you have two default options: to say yes, or to say no. No is a defensive action that can shield you from failure, but it can also prevent you from achieving what’s possible. In contrast, saying yes keeps ...
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Smiling is a simple act that comes instinctively when we see something nice, beautiful, or funny. A smile is a gesture of happiness and appreciation. A smile is only a series of contractions in our facial muscles, yet becomes associated with everything good in the world. Read on to find ...
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Do you often feel overwhelmed by the frenetic pace of life? Do you stress over the little things and feel frustration on a daily basis? If you’re ready for a change, consider adopting an attitude of gratitude. Being grateful, which means paying attention to good things moving your way, allows ...
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When you open yourself to beauty in the world, in other people, and in your own heart, you acknowledge the interconnectedness between yourself and all things on this planet. Being open to beauty allows you to find joy, experience the moment, and appreciate balance and harmony with life. Opening yourself ...
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It is a natural human desire to seek connection and approval from our fellow humans. When we receive approval from our peers, family members, and mentors, it can be validating and elicit many positive emotions. However, relying on external approval (external source of validation) can mean you are putting your ...
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For many people, it can be difficult to overcome negativity and focus on developing positive emotions. Anger, frustration, and anxiety often reign when we experience stress or encounter problematic situations. Positive emotions like joy, gratitude, serenity, hope, and love, on the other hand, can create a sense of well-being, purpose ...
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Compassion is an incredibly important human trait that bonds us across all divisions. When it comes to other people, most of us find it natural to notice and identity suffering. We feel emotionally moved and drawn to help that individual, and often act to alleviate their suffering in any small ...
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Have you ever been given tragic news and responded “I can’t believe it?” Been handed frustrating circumstances and wonder how “unfair” life can be? Often, to shield ourselves from confronting pain and moving forward into a positive future, we react to painful moments with denial, disbelief, suppression, and emotional procrastination. ...
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From a very young age people are encouraged to grow their horizons by joining activities such as boy scouts and after school sports. From there life only gets busier with school work, babysitting, part-time jobs, relationships and post-secondary education. Throughout our lifetime we rarely slow down to take moments for ...
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It was once believed that when an individual reached early adulthood the brain would reach its peak and would stop developing. It was also believed that around the age of forty our brain cells died off and there was no way to regenerate them. Decades of research , and new ...
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Meditation provides many benefits for the body, mind and soul. It creates a calming effect which eases stress and anxiety. Meditation can also give people a different perspective on difficult and trying situations, as well as increase self-awareness and reduce negativity overall. To start meditating follow the steps below: Getting ...
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Albert Einstein once said, “I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.” Although we are not quite there yet, we have become addicted to our technological devices. There is a growing body of scientific evidence supporting the idea of ...
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Transitions and changes are a part of everyday life, whether they are planned or unexpected. Quitting your job to start a new career, moving to a new city, or becoming a parent for the first time are all big changes in life, and having strong feelings of anxiety, stress, panic, ...
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Stress plays a major role in your everyday life, whether it is good or bad. It can release adrenaline that we need to get through nerve wrecking presentations, and help us amp up for the big game, but it can also have a negative effect on your life. Many Canadians ...
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The saying “you are your own worst critic” could not be more true, as many people have a tendency to be quite hard on themselves. Being your own worst critic can take a toll on your mental health as with time your pathological critic continues to grow stronger and could ...
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At some point in their lives many people start to find their relationships difficult and will unknowingly repeat behaviours that seem to sabotage their ability to be happy. Although it is common for couples to seek relationship counselling, many people do not realize that the individual counselling can often be ...
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Death or the loss of a loved one can have a devastating impact on your life. If you have lost a loved one and feel like your pain will never go away, there is a very good chance you may benefit from grief counselling. Grief naturally takes you through several ...
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Low self-esteem can make it difficult to pursue career goals, make friends or have long lasting relationships. Here are some suggestions to help you rebuild your self-esteem: Undergo Self Esteem Counselling Self-esteem counselling is perhaps one of the most important steps you can take to improve your self-esteem. In counselling you ...
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There are many common myths about therapy that can keep people from enjoying the many benefits therapy has to offer. Here are five common ones, debunked: Therapy Isn’t for Me From small towns to cities like Ottawa, therapy provides a perspective on life that assists people from all walks of ...
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